Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

A well needed update...





It's been so very crazy since the last time I posted, and I wish I had good news to update you all on. However, things recently have been very chaotic and devastating.
3 weeks ago, we learned that our Itty Bitty, had stopped developing at 5 weeks old. Two days before I had some spotting and I had a notion that something was not right. I visited my doctor, and she did an ultrasound and it looked like the baby was just fine. She couldn't see/hear a heartbeat just yet, because the baby hadn't hit 6 weeks yet. We were unsure of my due date since things were so very early on in pregnancy. 

The doctor called and told me two days later, that my hormone levels had dropped extremely low, and she was pretty sure that I was miscarrying. It was one of the hardest and roughest days of my life. I was scared, depressed, mad, confused, just to name a few. 

My body took care of everything on August 10th, but it was an experience that too many women and parents have gone through. I never knew how common miscarriages are. It was one of the most painful experiences, mentally and physically that I have ever been through.

A week after the miscarriage I had a visit with my doctor. She said everything looked great and that my body looked like I had never even been pregnant.

That day after my appointment, I went straight to St. Luke's Hospital in Houston to go visit my future father-in-law. He had been admitted for severe pneumonia. He looked grim, pale, and in pain. He was extremely emotional and scared. I had a feeling that our lives were about to change, drastically. 

On August 21, Brian and I had learned that his father has stage 4 Renal Cell Carcinoma, otherwise known as, kidney cancer. It had taken over the entire left kidney, spread to the left and right lungs, spread to his adrenal glands and lymph nodes. They were afraid that it had spread to his brain and bones, and they knew it was terminal. 

It was a day that hit us like a freight truck. We were pushed into reality that Brian's father may not survive much longer. As the days went on following the news, things started looking up. The cancer had not spread to the bones or brain, and the lung would be receptive to radiation to help his breathing to heal better.

Today, he is better. He has had 5 days of radiation to clear his left lung so that his immune system can get back to normal, so he can get over the pneumonia. They thought that taking out his kidney would be a good solution to get rid of the cancer. However, he is so weak, and surgery is so invasive, that it would be more harm to him to do so now. In the future, once his immune system builds back up, it will become an option.

Today is home and comfortable. He will continue radiation, and options will continue to come up throughout this entire process. Hopefully he will be around for years to come, and the doctors seem to be taking this one step at a time, and have assured us that no human has an expiration date.

Today things turned a little brighter. My brother was released from the treatment center he has been in for the past 7 months. It was a joyous day. It was such a blessing to be part of that experience with him. He was excited to get out and start a new chapter of his life, and to better his future.

I leave you tonight with a hopeful heart. I trust in God, and will 'be still' (Psalms 46:10). I know our Lord has great plans for us. I know that my child is now safe and out of harms way, and is loved. I know that Brian's father is being protected by someone who cares so deeply about him. I know that my brother has someone rooting for him on every step he takes.

God is good, ALWAYS.






 
 

heartAmber



 

Friday, May 27, 2011

Who needs a silly APPENDIX? {part II}

 This is my continued story from yesterday about my emergency appendectomy. Go see Part I of this story!
 
 
 Brian and I with the gorgeous plan he got me right before surgery!
 They started wheeling me away! He snapped pics, thank goodness!
 
They took me downstairs and I started to get nervous {see in the pic above, yah, lots of praying, and breathing happened at this moment.} Then I started crying once my parents and Brian had to leave me. I was knocked out quick. I remember getting on the operating table and that was it.  The surgery was laproscopic, which meant that they went through my belly-button and two other small incisions. Minimal scarring is the best way to put it. However, when you have junk, such as extra cushion like me, it takes a little bit longer to find an appendix, lol. I apparently have a small abdominal cavity too. The surgery took an hour, and went very well. My appendix was definitely the problem. It was inflamed and infected, and within a few days would have ruptured *gross*.

After surgery, it was all kinda blurry. I remember alot of people in my room when I got back, and it was loud. I wanted Brian right away, and him, my mom, and my dad stood by my side immediately. I called out for Brian and he said he almost started tearing up. I'm sure I looked horrible when I came out. I was doped up, and had an oxygen mask on. Scary.

Most everyone left the room after my mom asked them to. I was tired, blacking out, and wanted to sleep. I got up to use the restroom within an hour of the surgery, and ended up not using the restroom, but getting sick to my stomach instead. My mom was terrified and thought that something was really wrong. I was vomiting from the anesthesia, and it was totally normal. 

Family started trickling in and out, and then they all left. It was great to have them there. It meant the world to me and I joked before surgery several times that they were my 'entourage'. 

I finally had a liquid meal of chicken broth, and orange jello. I became obsessed with that jello. It was so good to finally have something in my stomach again after another full day of no food. 

I slept most of the night, it was split up in two periods of time by the nurses coming in to check my vitals and my draining my overflowing bladder from the IV! I had some severe pain, and was starting to feel my incisions throughout the night, and had to have pain meds, as well as gas meds too. I got addicted to graham crackers and peanut butter as well as the orange jello. Apparently those are great things to eat after surgery!
 Brian was with me the entire night, holding my hand, and taking care of my every need. He is such an amazing man, and I could not imagine how scared he was. Our relationship grew a bit stronger after this past week {even though I thought I couldn't possibly love him any more than I already did.} My cup runneth over.

The next day we waited and waited for word about when I would be going home. I had a solid meal of toast, canadian bacon, and more jello, of course. {I'm starting to want orange jello yet again.} We finally got the word, and we took off to El Campo.

I slept alot of the weekend, napping, watching videos, and taking a good rest per doctors orders. Brian and I had to get out of the house on Saturday so we went and saw the new Pirates movie. It was good, not great, but good. I wore myself out and we took it easy Sunday and Monday. Tuesday was my post-op check up with my amazing doctor from the University of Texas. He told me all was well, and that I should be back to my normal self within 2-3 weeks! YAY!
 
I've been doing well, and was humbled by all of the wonderful love that was expressed during this time...I have great family and friends, nuff said. God was watching over me, and I thank Him so much for letting me continue on with my life. 
Here are some more pics of the flowers...I edited these with Instagram on my iPhone 4 of course, lol!





 
 
 
heartAmber
 

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Who needs a silly APPENDIX ?

Who needs a silly APPENDIX ? {Part One}

Wow, what a crazy past 2 weeks it has been! 

I'm sure you've been wondering where I've been, and I am SO sorry that I haven't been around!

Last Thursday, May 19, I had an emergency appendectomy! A week before that I was having horrible upper abdomen pain, and was having trouble breathing. I finally took ibuprofen to settle it and I never had problems after that, until last Tuesday. I was having some massive cramping going on in my lower abdomen, but shook it off as gas, lol. WRONG!

The next morning I was driving into Rosenberg {45 minutes away from home}, when I was having excruciating pains every 3-5 minutes that lasted about 30 seconds to a minute long each. Some were so severe that I started shaking and had to do breathing exercises to calm myself.  After about 30 minutes or so of these scary stabbing pains, I started to get worried. I walked into Hobby Lobby to grab a few things, and found myself curled over in pain. I quickly left and called family in our hometown, as well as my mother.

I started heading home thinking that I would just see a doctor in El Campo, when my Aunt, whose had several female surgeries hooked me up with an appointment with an amazing Gynecologist in Sugarland. I headed back into Sugarland for my appointment and called Brian asap. Brian was on edge the entire day, thankfully my Aunt Jackie met me and stayed with me that entire day! I saw the doctor, she did an ultrasound {the not so friendly kind if you know what I mean}, and several samples, needless to say there was nothing wrong with me, female wise. However, while we were talking and doing all the testing/exams, I was having some major pains especially after the ultrasound.  I actually started tearing up because I was in so much pain.

Immediately the doctor insisted I get a CAT Scan, to see if my appendix was the problem. I had to drink disgusting contrast. It's a liquid that they have you drink ALOT of. It's horrible, they gave me the berry smoothie kind. Bleh. I hadn't eaten anything that day at all, and I couldn't until after the CT Scan.
They scanned me finally, and I headed home. They told me that the doctor would call me with the results. At around 5:15pm I got a call from her telling me that I had acute appendicitis. I was shocked. Then she insisted that I get back to the hospital asap before it ruptured or caused any more problems. I was to be admitted into the ER that night and would have surgery the next day!

My mom was already on her way to my house once she knew I took my CT scan. {She lives in Johnson City, 3 hours away from El Campo, remember}. She was going to be at my house at 6 and we would leave and head back to Sugarland. I packed, we got the dogs set up, and I started to have a little pain again.

I was starving so we stopped at Texas Roadhouse, and we pigged out on Prime Rib. YUM. I knew I wouldn't have normal food in a while, so I figured why not. We headed to the ER, where we were welcomed by my wonderful Aunt Cindy, she lives in Houston, and was around there anyways. She came with a bag of awesome goodies for me, magazines, facial wipes, socks and more!

Brian left that morning to go to Center, TX, 5 hours from Houston. Once he heard about the surgery and my condition, he came home as quickly as possible. My uncle, Brian's boss, told him to get to me asap. Thank goodness. He arrived around midnight, and him, and my mom slept in the room with me on a couch and a reclining chair, while I tried to get comfortable with an IV on a hospital bed.

I stayed pretty optimistic until right before the surgery. The night was long, and I wanted to be at home so badly. The next morning all my family started to trickle in. We found out that I was having surgery at 1pm, and that they were taking me to the operating room around 11:45am. It was great having so much support around me. It kept me in good spirits. I also got great flowers and plants from family and friends. It was wonderful....


 
* Tomorrow I will finish this story. It's so long, I wanted to split it up, for reading purposes.*
 
Stay tuned....

These are flowers I received during my hospital stay, more pics tomorrow!




 

heartAmber

 

Friday, March 18, 2011

giveaway winner announced

Thank you to all who entered the giveaway!
 
i was so excited to celebrate my 100th post,
 
drum roll please.....
 
the winner of the $25 Hobby Lobby Giftcard is...
 
 



CONGRATS JEN!

I know the announcement is a bit late, but things in Japan are critical and the past few days have been focused on my future brother-in-law and his family.

Keep your prayers flowing for them. We're trying to help them in any way possible.



I'll try to stick to the facts directly from my future BIL. Things are changing fairly quickly over there and we get news one hour, and then an hour later, everything has changed.

Our plans are to keep helping them until they get answers. They aren't sure whether or not they will be staying in Japan. The radiation level seems to be ok still, but the nuclear emergency over there is hightening tension and chaos.

There were voluntary evacuations to South Korea, however those were cancelled by Obama. Now the voluntary evacuations are for just the families of the servicemen/women, and they are directly to the states. So my BIL will stay while his wife & child come to Houston. They have not decided whether or not to come to the states yet. They can stay in Japan, until an emergency mandatory evacuation is enforced. They can decide to stay and if Japan fixes the nuclear and radiation issues, then there will be no mandatory evacuations for American forces.



 Again, prayers are always needed, and God can do such powerful things. My heart is hurting along with my future husbands. I will try to keep, you, my wonderful, loyal readers, updated as much as possible. Thank you for your love & support so much, it means the world to me!
 
 
heartAmber

Monday, March 14, 2011

life, interrupted...

 
 
I have one word...PRAY...
 
my future family lives in Japan
 
the Japan that got hit with an 8.9 mag earthquake
the Japan that got swept with a tsunami
the Japan that is being affected by radiation,
and the Japan that is prone to another earthquake any minute
 
my future brother-in-law, sister-in-law, and nephew live in Atsugi, Japan
they experienced the earth shattering earthquake,
but by a miracle, didn't get affected by the tsunami
 
the nightmare is getting worse as the minutes move on
 
they're safe, they're healthy
but prayers can move mountains
and they're needed
 
we're keeping updated with them
my BIL emails us daily
we just got an email about radiation
and how their plan is to stay inside
luckily, they live on an American Naval Base
and are extremely protected
 
we want them to be safe
we want to hug them
kiss them
be with them
but they're so far away
and life is so unpredictable
 
our earth is being shaken up
over and over again
 
God is sending us messages
more prayer
more belief
more love
 
i fear God
but i trust God
 
so i pray
and i'm asking YOU to do the same
 
pray for japan
 
pray for my family
 
this picture was taken last June


our skype call with them the night of the earthquake
or the morning we found out
7:42 AM CST
9:42 PM Tokyo, Japan
March 11, 2011





he picked his boogers for his uncle
uncle tried to eat them through the phone

priceless


 
heartAmber

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Happy Birthday to my Momma!

Today was my momma's birthday!
 
I love her SOOOO much!
My dad and I took her to her favortie restaurant Carraba's and had Chocolate Martini's, Spiedino de Mar, Apple Crostata, and a great time! We enjoyed MANY laughs, and it was so awesome to enjoy a meal that was relaxed and so delish!
 
We went to Bed Bath & Beyond, and she got two really cool gadgets for her house! A Roomba iRobot Vacuum cleaner and a Mint iRobot mop and sweeper! Soooo cool! {I found my Kitchen Aid Ice Cream Maker, and HAD to buy it while I was there...I never get to go to BBB
 
Here are some pics of me and my mommy to celebrate her bday! I've dedicated this post to her!
 
 

{NYE 2010}

{Baffin Bay 2010}

{my gorgeous momma at BoydFest 2010}

{Port A 2009}

{my bday 2009}

{TX State FB game 2007}

{Retama Park 2006}


{nutty brown 2007}

{Christmas 2006}

{Angelo State FB Game 2005, my first semester of college, thats my little brother in the back}
 
 
Happy Birthday Momma!

heartAmber

Friday, February 18, 2011

Yes, I promise I'm alive!

I have ALOT of stuff I'll be posting in the next few days, so prepare yourself, lol!

I have won another award, which I'll explain later.

I'm at my parents house in Johnson City, enjoying my R&R! Get ready for picture overload soon, and we're getting closer and closer to my 100th post! More about that later too!

I hope you are all doing well my lovely readers! For now I'll leave you with a pic of myself, an old pic of myself and Brian, and some candid face-time pics of Brian and I. I downloaded an awesome new app on my iPhone. Instagram. I have so many more pics to share! the only one I'm sharing from the app is the one of myself!

Thanks for reading!
























Friday, January 7, 2011

A Trying New Year Ahead

What a crazy new year it has been, already...

The beginning has been a bit trying, to say the least.

One of the main reasons I haven't blogged is because I have been preparing for a long year ahead, without my brother. If you don't personally know me, then you probably don't know the story about my brother. I'll try to make this as quick as possible, and not bore you.


{this is my brother and I in 2009 before things got really ugly}

My brother is an alcoholic and drug addict. He is 21 years old, I am 23. He is an amazing person when he is sober, and living his life through our Lord. However, when he is high/drunk, he is the worst person I personally know. My brother has been an addict/alcoholic since he was 14, yes 14. He would sneak things into our home, hide them, and use...over and over again. His high school years were mostly a blur because he was high. He didn't graduate high school because he was high. He has been arrested 3 times in the past 2 years because he was high. He has totaled 2 vehicles between June 2008 and June 2009. He is in trouble, and he needs help.

The Story:

In October of 2009, he was arrested and put in jail, and immediately was bailed out by my parents. He then begged us to help admit himself into a rehab center. He went for 45 days. We learned so much about this incredibly baffling disease, and were educated beyond all belief even though it was extremely overwhelming. From that day forward, the lives of our family would never be the same.

He was at his first rehab for 45 days, relapsed (in our house with both my parents and myself in the house, and we had no idea, while he was there for 2 days) when he got out, and went into a more strict rehab center for 4 months. He then moved into a sober house, and then another one, then his own apartment, and then he was arrested for a DWI in October of 2010  in downtown Austin. He broke his curfew, he drank, he did drugs, and he tried to drive, at 4 o'clock in the morning.

He served his time in jail for 14 days, yes 14 days for a DWI, insane that its that short, trust me its not enough. He now has a DWI on his record, and it will never come off. However, the other charges that were dropped, just days before his DWI, came back on his record, and his probation was revoked, and he had to go in front of a judge to decide his future.

The judge sentenced him to 8 months in a state treatment center near Austin. As well as adding 3 months to that sentence of being in a state sober house in Austin. 11 months of recovery. He must admit himself into the county jail, and then he will stay there until a bed opens up in the treatment center. He could be in the jail for a few days, a few weeks, or even a few months. The 8 months doesn't start until he enters the treatment center.

Recently things with John were wonderful, we know longer let him put guilt trips on us, he was a much happier person to be around. Even though he is one of the most selfish people I know, it was awesome to be with my little brother for Christmas, since we hadn't spent the holidays together in 2 years.

On Tuesday, our family drove the 3 hours to the county jail where his sentence was supposed to be filled. However, his probation officer wasn't there, and the jail had no record that he was supposed to be going in. It was infuriating, stressfull, and emotionally draining. So we drove the 3 hours back to our house for the night, and my mom, my brother and I watched some home movies of when he was 1. Home movies from 20 years ago.

The only thing that he managed to say during the movies was how our lives were revolved around me, yes me. He said I was spoiled and wanted all the attention, and took all the attention away from him, even on his birthday. It angered both my mother and I, and we stopped the movies in disappointment that this disease was taking him from us.

Wednesday his probation officer called with a horrible attitude, mad at the world that John wasn't in jail that morning when he called from vacation. He told us that John needed to be there now, and that he was in violation of his court order. My father was infuriated and told us that we would be dropping John off again and going through the 6+hours we drove the day before all over agian. It was just as stressfull as the day before, but we managed to drop him off for good. He is still in a holding cell in the county jail as I'm writing this. Again the sentence doesn't start until he arrives at the treatment center.

If you are wondering why I'm emphasizing this, my wedding is in 9 months and 16 days. He is to spend 8 months in the treatment center. If he doesn't get in to the treatment center before February 15, he won't be able to be a groomsman in Brian and I's wedding. I actually took him to Men's Wearhouse last week and got his measurements because we knew he couldn't get measured in June/July like we intend the rest of the groomsmen to get fitted.

Now you're asking, how could you do so much for him and love such an evil person? My answer is, he is my brother, he always is, he always is be. It's not my brother doing these evil, sinful things, it's the diseases. He has two diseases, alcoholism and addiction. Most people don't believe this to be true. They think it has something to do with maturity, and becoming an adult. But his diseases prevent him from maturing and becoming an adult. His brain is missing a crucial deciding ability. The addict/alcoholic is spontaneous and doesn't think about the consequences of their actions until its too late. I just thank the good Lord that he isn't dead, or hasn't killed anyone. God has watched over him all these years and has made sure that this hasn't happened yet. My brother has only hurt our family and more importantly himself, and God.

My parents and I have been educated enough about these diseases to let it all go. We've understood everything we could about what we're going through. We have thrown our hands to God in confusion and conflicting emotions. We so badly want to rescue him, but we so badly want to be angry with him, and the truth is, neither one will suffice enough, as much as we'd like to think.

Summary of this story {which I'm sure you're wondering what it is}: I won't be seeing my brother for at least a few months, and maybe even the full 8 months that he is in the treatment center. I love my brother, probably more than he would like me to, and more than he loves me. I no longer have much emotion when it comes to talking, or thinking about him. I simply pray for him, and our family as this journey goes on, and I leave it all to God for the future. I've come to terms that he probably won't be a part of the biggest day of my life. But I still have an inch of hope in a million foot journey that we're going through.

There is a lot more that I could have covered, but I'm pretty sure this is the jist of this subject. I know many of you may have questions, so give me a chance to answer them by commenting below. I have no problem with being completely honest about this situation.

Please pray for our family, and for my brother. I don't want sympathy, I want prayers. Prayers that help heal my brother, prayers that help heal our family.


my brother John, my fiance' Brian, my dad, me and my mom at a Port Aransas family vacation in September 2009

my brother, me, my mom, and my dad at Baffin Bay October 2010


Here are a few verses to leave you with that tugged on my heart strings during the past few days, that seemed to relate to how I was feeling.

***My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you. *James 1:19-21*

***And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. *1 Peter 5:10*

***Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans. *Proverbs 16:3*

***Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing. *James 1:2-4*

God Bless,
 Photobucket

Sunday, December 5, 2010

This Past Week...

It's been a few long days since my last post. Here's whats been happening:

11.30: I traveled home to El Campo to get ready for Brian's return home. Got together with my cousin's wife Melissa and her kids, Baylee and Kade and we played Wii Just Dance2. Needless to say, I got a well needed workout!

12.1: I slept in LATE...shame shame...but it felt so wonderful, and I had a massive headache that I couldn't kick the night before! Then took my sick grandmother some leftover Thanksgiving dinner (frozen) and some turkey soup. I got together with Melissa and her family gathered at her house as we all ate stew, watched the kids play, and then put up Christmas lights.

12.2: I woke up, and worked my tail off to get my house clean. My mom and brother arrived at my house from Austin, and then Brian returned home from Pecos an hour later! All of us, plus my aunt, hopped in my mom's truck and traveled to Sugarland to get some grub at Carraba's before the live stream broadcast of Glenn Beck's Broke. The food was wonderful, and Glenn Beck taught me so much. It was a long night of talking with family in El Campo after the show.

12:3: Lack's is going out of business, and I wanted to see what they were offering. We bought a new sectional couch with a coffee table and end table (pictures to be uploaded this week). We got everything half off. Then we all packed up and headed to Austin to meet with my father at Plucker's Wings, and then headed to Johnson City to unpack. Brian and I then traveled back into Austin with our friend (Brian's best man), Justin. A local Texas Country Music Artist, Kyle Park, was playing live at Midnight Rodeo. So we went dancing and had a few drinks, and then headed home after the concert.

12:4: Lazy day, we slept in...hehe...then my parents, brother, Brian and I went shopping for my brother's birthday. We had an experimental dinner at Kona Grill. It was mostly a sushi, and japanese grill. It was an experience, to say the least. We tried sushi, which tasted great, but didn't settle very nicely, lol. But overall their food was great. I'm not sure if we will be going We had a great time, and my brother enjoyed every bit of it!


Brian trying out his chopsticks for dinner!

Birthday Boy eating his red velvet cupcake!

Great picture, besides it being fuzzy from the lighting!

I couldn't resist the look of this...I ate almost the entire thing!!! It was so delish!


Today has been an even lazier day. I have been debating all day about posting, but just didn't have anything special to post...hence the preview of my previous week.

I haven't thought too much about the week ahead of me. I know tomorrow Brian and I will travel back to EC and decorate our house for Christmas, as well as do a few projects around the house. I will be getting our Christmas photo cards printed this next week, and start mailing those out as well.

Brian could leave anytime between Tuesday and December 15 for a job, so I usually don't plan anything because there might be the possibility of him staying home for a few days. He was asked to go back to West Virginia the day he got back from Pecos. He turned the job down, in fear that he would be snowed in before Christmas and woudln't be able to make it home for his actual holiday off.



God Bless, Photobucket